oh mexico

James Taylor anyone? After finishing with Peace Corps I was hankering for a trip (some change, some perspective, you know the story).  So for Easter week Rene and I headed off to Huehuetenango to see his family and then ship off to Chiapas, Mexico for 72 hours (the amount of time Mexico allows Guatemalans in their country).

Before we left, I read a book called Uprising of Hope: The Zapatista Journey to Alternative Development by Duncan Earle and Jeanne Simonelli.  It was a FACINATING read, especially as someone super interested in what is development and how different communities envision progress (and who was planning on going to Chiapas).  Anyway, it helped me understand or at least start to understand a little bit of the history of Chiapas and the Zapatista movement.  (I bought the book at a used bookstore in Chagrin Falls, Ohio for $1, when my friend Katherine was visiting Ohio last summer).

Anyway, my 72 hour Chiapas experience was great!  We took all public transportation and I was blown away by 1.) how efficient their system is and 2.) how terrible Guatemala's transport is in comparison.  Rene had a great time (once we made it through the border crossing from hell).  Highlights were:  1.) A taxi driver saying 'Sorry, I'm lost.  There are a lot of streets in this city'. 2.)We didn't have a lot of time, so we each picked one place/activity and Rene chose an orchid nursery! Which was super cool and something I would have never done.  I chose a long walk to the cemetery. 3.) One day we took a road trip to Aguas Azules, Misol-ha and Palenque and it was 12 hours of car time and it was so fun!  4.) Lots of cools stuff to buy that you can't get in Guatemala, Rene bought a leather wall hanging and I got some amazing weaving (guipil, wrap, and another embroidered wrap).  Wish we'd had more time, definitely going back in the future!

Pickup ride to La Democracia, Huehuetenango

Canopy in Santa Ana Huista, Huehuetenango

Terrible Mexican man who was determined to ruin our vacation!

Beautiful painting displayed in the Central Park of San Cristobal de las Casas, Chiapas, Mexico

View of San Cristobal de las Casas from the Cementary

Cool cars all over the place...

Nerdy trip to an orchid nursery!

One of the main plazas in the afternoon

Aguas Azules, Chiapas

Aguas Azules, Chiapas

Misol-ha Waterfall, Chiapas, Look for the people to see how big it is!

The Mayan Temples of Palenque!

Just cool. 

Super cool.



Cute.

the after...

I always thought I knew how I would feel when it was over.  An enormous sense of accomplishment, a relief, a freedom, an excitement about pushing forward with my life.  But that was not how it was.  I felt a loss, a penetrating and profound loss.  The feeling that it was all over, not that it was just beginning.

My journey through Peace Corps was rough, in the sense that life is rough.  Peace Corps isn’t any different than what my life would have been like in the U.S. (crappy days, amazing days, love and heartbreak, terrible bosses and wonderful bosses, hectic days and relaxing days).  We are humans, and no matter where in the world we find ourselves, these emotions and challenges find us.  Period.

I sometimes try to imagine what my life would be like right now if I had not become a Peace Corps volunteer.  And it’s funny, because normally I love exercises like that, dreaming up the ‘what-if’s, but I’m drawing a blank on this one.  I have no idea what I would be doing if I weren’t here, lounging on my bed with a computer in my lap in the highlands of Guatemala.  This is place where I feel so very right at this very moment.

But I suppose that’s the joke of it all.   When you go into the Peace Corps, you can’t imagine what it will be like.  And when you leave the Peace Corps, you can’t imagine your life without that experience.

What was it like down there?

How will I answer this question?  How have I answered this question?  It was transformative down here.  Absolutely and irrevocably transformative.

Yesterday, I felt a loss.  A heartache.  I felt an ending.

But today, with the sun pouring through my dirty window, my dog cuddled up for her morning nap, my second cup of coffee by my side, I feel a possibility in my room, bouncing around like the lone fly that has managed to enter.  I feel a calm.  I feel that even though I don’t have my future mapped out, even though I’m not ever quite sure, that it’s okay.  That I made the right decision taking some time off to write, to think, to enjoy life ‘down here’. 

And while a part of me wishes that I had gone home, wishes that today I was on a plane Cleveland bound, another part of me knows that I would be a wreck.  That I would be selfish and sour, not at all the person I want to be.  That I would be grieving the loss of so much that I have fought so hard to gain here.  So for now, it’s for the best to work through my story here.  Work through all of the chapters that have piled up in my brain and put back together the scraps that were once, my heart.

 

Goodbye with my coworkers!



Last day goodbye to my counterpart Riva!



The entrance to the Peace Corps Guatemala office...



My final presentation for some of my favorite PC Staff.



Ringing the bell as a symbol of the closure of my service...

 

The last day...

It’s hard to believe at 10:00 a.m. today I will finishing my Peace Corps Service.  The past three years have FLOWN by.  It has been a transformative experience to live and work here in Guatemala, an experience which was hard, incredibly hard but also incredibly rewarding.  In honor of this, my last day, I would like to thank all of the people far away who made it possible…

My parents:  Mamacita y Papi, you two were my saving grace throughout my time here, I would not have made it this far without you…. You were the first to come and visit, your emails dad, your 5am calls mom.  I love you both!

My sisters:  Sommer, Nicole, you both wrote me funny emails to check in and make sure I was alive, sometimes a Peace Corps Volunteer just needs to see her sister’s names in her inbox and that helps her get through the day!  And to Jenny, who has been there for me every Thursday at the break of dawn to make me late for work (and to my bro in law, who turns a blind eye to the phone bill!)  I love you all!

The sobrinos: Gavin, Karin, Bennyboo, Lilis and Winny!  Thanks, for the cuteness, letters and drawings…

My Aunts and Uncles: Jim and Nancy, my tios locos who believe in the healing power of natural water and who check my blog more than I do!  Leslie, who sends me postcards from all over the world and is never too busy for her niece.  Vicky, who writes me the most amazing emails just to let me know that she was thinking of me.  Stevie, who has a way of making me feel like I’m loved even from far away.

My Grandma:  This amazing lady who I save up minutes to call once a month (because we chat for like two hours)!  She always tells me how proud she is of me, which sometimes I just need to hear.  And we always find similarities of her childhood on a farm in Wisconsin and the highlands of Guatemala.  Thanks grams!

My Friends: My lades: Kate, Laura, Christina, you are my conscience, my good side, and my laughs.  Allie and Katherine, even though we’re terrible at staying touch, I know you’re there and that’s enough (and you both came to CLEVELAND just to see me when I came home to visit).

 

 

 

 

One more day...

Laguna Chicabal, 2012

Two days to go: Best Crazy Face

La loca, La Calera, Zunil, 2014

3 days left: Best Smiles...

Carnaval, 2012

my best animal pic...

Baby Turtle, Monterrico, 2012

this is one my best...

Great grandpa, 2013

still going...

My favorite girls visit Guatemala, 2012

7 days left...

My best PC Photo Bomb!!! 2013

8 days left...

Pascuala, Vicki and myself on All Saint´s day, Zunil, Quetzaltenango, November 2013

the countdown

It´s April 1st, which means that I have 10 days left with the Peace Corps.  It has been an especially hard week, I don´t want to go into details, but it has been the hardest week in my service.  Thanks for all of the love and support, you know who you are... 

In honor of my last days, each day I am going to post a picture I have taken during my time here, that I love.



´Mujercita´ taken at my house in Zunil, Quetzaltenango, in January 2014.



words matter

Yesterday I went to my favorite English used bookstore to sell some books (and get some new ones).  I was chatting with the gentleman who was working (let´s say 50 years old, proud owner of a nice dog that was cuddled up in the chair).  Said gentleman started telling me about some work he did about an hour outside of Colomba (a county here in Quetzaltenango), ´there we were in this little village...´ I sort of zoned out at that point.

The word village is such the wrong word.  Why?  Well, because it has implications.  People tend to only use the word village when referring to the developing world.  Someone who visits rural midwestern America will find lots of ´villages´ but when recounting to friends later, they´ll use ´oh and then we went to this cute little town called _____´.   So when I hear the word village, I hear, this poor little godforsaken group of shacks.  A village is a community.  A rural community.  Our words have power and we keep maginalizing people by labeling them with something out of date and offensive. 



Type ´Guatemalan village´ in google images and this appears.  The original caption was ´A sacred hill and Maya village, Guatemala´.  http://www.mexicolore.co.uk/aztecs/calendar/december-21st-2012-2


Frankly, village isn´t the only word that gives me this reaction.  The word ´tribe´, really gets me riled up.  Tribe is an ethnicity.  Only when we refer to groups of people in Africa do people use the word tribe.  Why?  Racism?  Possibly.  The truth is, I don´t know why people haven´t figured this out yet.  Please, if you use the word tribe, stop. 

I´m on a roll.  The label, ´Maya´.   Oh the Maya.  After three years of living with the Maya in a rural village (typing that hurt!).  The Maya were an ancient civilization.  The indigenous people of Guatemala might claim Mayan roots, they might wear clothing rooted in Mayan tradition, they might speak language derived out of Mayan languages, BUT that does not mean they are Mayan.  To put it in persective, you speak English.  Let´s pretend your ancestors were from Scotland.  Your clothes are shockingly similar to those warn by your ancestors (pants and shirts and kilts, hello!).  Are you Scottish?  Are you the modern Scottish?  No, you are you.  Yes, you have an ethnicity.  Yes, you have a nation.  Yes, you have a language.  Yes, you have roots and ancestors and a history.  But no one comes to visit your suburb and say, WOW LOOK AT THESE PEOPLE, THE MODERN SCOTTISH IN A VILLAGE IN AMERICA.  Okay, I know, a little drastic?  Perhaps, but I think you get my point.   

Am I crazy?  Maybe, but for me it´s a great litmus test to understand people.  How about you?  Do the words village/tribe/maya make you cringe? 

You may disagree, but I think you might agree that words matter and have power.  When we use words that marginalize, we are creating injustice. 

creativity

Here I am presenting in Flores Costa Cuca (drenched in sweat)

 Happy tuesday to you!  So I´m just about at the T-1month point with Peace Corps...  And let me just say that I´m really excited.  There´s something about change that makes one see new possibilities and freedoms, that in reality were always there, but until you finish something you don´t let yourself see it.

This past month, here at the office we´ve been giving workshops to all the school principals of the state (590!) on how to improve evaulation techniques in the classroom.  USAID has a program called Reforma en el aula (Reform in the Classroom, YOUR TAX DOLLARS AT WORK, PEOPLE!) that produced a great book full of little gems on how to make better tests, how to use debate, selfevaluation and a ton of other tools to make sure students are learning and not just attending school. 

NOTE THE PROJECTOR SCREEN!

These workshops have meant some brutally early mornings (alarm at 4:30 a.m.), but it´s been great to get to go to municiapalities that I hadn´t visited before.  The directors have been pretty great, it´s amazing how receptive people can be when you are talking about a subject that interests their intellectual/educational background.  When I worked with the Healthly Schools project, it would feel like pulling teeth to get teachers active about health habits in the schools.  Why?  They are not health workers.  If they had an interest in health issues they would have chosen to be health workers.  But they didn´t, they chose to be teachers.  And while being a teacher implies holistic education, sometimes spending hours talking about brushing teeth and hand washing just isn´t that exciting.

BUT, what does excite them is how to teach better.  And that´s what this past year has been (for me).  Working with teachers on how to teach better.  Specifically how to teach reading better. 

When I was home, I went to visit my nieces´ preschool classroom and I was blown away.  They had a treasure chest, dress up clothes, colorful rugs, A PLAYGROUND!  When I came back to Guate I was in this mentality ´what a difference´, not good, not bad, just what a pronounced difference that money makes in how we live our lives, how we educate, how we operate, how we function. 

Please take a look at the projector screen we used at our most recent workshop in Flores Costa Cuca.  You are not mistaken, that is in fact a white bed sheet.  Now, how practical is that!  Super portable, super easy to hang anywhere, no need to lug some huge projector screen, or spend hundreds of dollars to buy a huge projector screen and install it.  Call me crazy, but THIS. IS. GENIOUS.  I love the juxtaposition of using the technology of a projector, with a bed sheet.  Sometimes money makes us impractical.  Just as poverty makes us creative. 

Now, I´m sort of looking at everything and saying, Wait. One. Second.  This is only one example.  There are thousands.  Hundreds of thousands of brillant little things here that make me think, ´Hey, that´s really smart´.  This is not just in Guate, it´s in the US, in Nigeria, in Turkey, in France, in the Philipines.  So I´m on a new mission to start appreciating these details of creativity...

p.s.  Killed the third mouse in my house yesterday.  Pia is turning into a hunting dog (I´m not opposed).  My house being nicknamed ´La Ratonera´ by my host fam is endearing, right???     

HOT OFF THE PRESSES!!!!

Last year I was handed a project called ´Journalists of the Future´ sponsored by Nuestro Diario (one of the leading newspapers here in Guatemala).  The project involved training teachers on how to teach journalism to kids in forth, fifth and sixth grade.  The final project required the teachers to produce a newspaper with their students!  Then I helped to mesh all of the newspapers together to create one newspaper that represented the state of Quetzaltenango.  Last week officials from the Ministry of Education in Guatemala City, along with officials from Nuestro Diario came to deliver 4,000 copies of the newspaper the kids made, but all fancy and digitized!  Here are some pictures from the event:

These kids graduated last year, but they were the back bone of this project!

All the bigwhigs (except the blonde on the end)

This is Rivadavia, my counterpart

Kids reading!

More kids reading!

Feliz Día del Cariño

Happy Valentine´s Day!

Tzalajb´il toj tq´ijil qoklen (Mam)

Jel´alaj q´ij chiwe qachalal (K´iche´)

Feliz día del cariño (Spanish)

Today we had a party at the office!  The past two weeks we´ve been doing secret valentines (imagine secret santa but way more complicated), it involved leaving your secret friend a little something everyday (which is hard when you all work in relatively close quarters).  Today all 25 of us had some fun and revealed our secret valentines and had a delicious snack to celebrate the day...

Myself, Susi, Hector and Norma!  Norma was my secret valentine :)

Check out that cake! 

It´s so nice when you like the people you work with!  Here´s to working with some AMAZING guatemalan women!

The big boss eating an incredible pache!

Well, as you can tell I was pretty bummed when the party was over and we had to get back to work...  I hope you all have/are having a wonderful day, remember to tell the people you love how much you love them!

starting...

Library reading class finale with the kiddos and my sitemate Maggie!

I love December!  It means Christmas, my birthday, new years...  But this year it was especially special, it meant a visit to Rene's house and back to Cleveland for one of my best friend's wedding!

Girls group secret santa...

Rene's house in La Democracia, Huehuetenango

Christmas day with a coffee plant (the coffee is the seed of the red fruit)

Christmas day smoothies

We got a puppy for Rene's little sister's high school graduation gift

Roasting coffee to take to fam/friends in the US

From right to left Rene, his mom Rosenda, his little sister Vicky, his nephew Emanuel, his brother Juan, his sister in law Celida (Christmas tree in background!)

My birthday cake (25 and soooo mature)

The bday get together with all 18 of us, cake and hot chocolate!

Many people asked me what the Christmas traditions are like in Guatemala.  Generally speaking, it's a Christmas Eve dinner with the family (mass if the family is Catholic) and staying up until midnight to light fireworks (and almost burn down the house!).  Normally families do not give formal gifts, they might go shopping together and give kids money (which most little boys spend on fireworks/firecrackers).  Families eat grapes and American apples and of course MARSHMELLOWS...  I did not open one single gift, and you know what, it was nice.  I would urge you to take the gifts out of Christmas, try it!

My birthday was wonderful!  I took my laundry to the Laundromat and had icecream with a friend.  I then went shopping and splurged on a pair of shoes and Rene met me for a subway lunch (what a treat), we bought the cakes and hot chocolate and then I went back home to prepare for the family party...

I am now back in Cleveland for my dear Laura's wedding (soooo excited)!  It is wonderful to see family and enjoy the snow and eat tons of delicious food (although I have been stomach sick here, probably all of the dairy and rich foods and processed junk). 

Thanks to everyone who called, wrote, emailed, and sent me love and light during these beautiful days.  Here's to getting older and starting new....