18.7.09
8.7.09
‘it’s like forgetting the words, to your favorite song’ –rs
this week I have been very wrapped up in me. and now, I’m understanding that that was a very bad thing to do. my exams were ‘suspended’ due to the swine flu outbreak here. but instead of taking it as it was, I got angry at the situation. I demanded to change my flight and go home early. but now in retrospect that was a premature decision. and so, I got angry at myself all over again for making a mistake (but this does not make me a child, merely human). and throughout all of this, I forgot the big picture (which may in fact, make me a child).
everyday the lives of six billion people play out. dreams are crushed, love is found, new beginnings start, beautiful things die, but hope survives. I forgot that what happened this week in my small life means more than just ‘I hate this situation and I hate how I handled it’.
but the moon, my dad, and the girls from the ludo reminded me. there is a lot more going on than my stupid exams. so what if I have to take them in septemeber, I’ll do fine. in fact, it will most likely be a blessing in disguise (as most things are, or end up being). we all learn way more outside of the classroom anyway, but in that respect, I can’t help but feeling like I failed my ‘life final’ to this experience.
it’s not easy for me to admit that I was scared by this ‘sickness’. the idea that one small little particle can end a life just made me feel tragically fragile. all I really wanted was to go home, but not because home is safe. home may not be a perfect place, there may be a pandemic there too, or civil unrest or death or uncertainty, but it is home. and it is where my small life, in that small acre on Glenallen Avenue, feels safe.
and so, I apologize for my behavior. but know I never meant to cause you trouble or do you harm. I just forgot that the moon shines and that bad things are going to happen, and how we deal with those things are what defines who we are.
this week I have been very wrapped up in me. and now, I’m understanding that that was a very bad thing to do. my exams were ‘suspended’ due to the swine flu outbreak here. but instead of taking it as it was, I got angry at the situation. I demanded to change my flight and go home early. but now in retrospect that was a premature decision. and so, I got angry at myself all over again for making a mistake (but this does not make me a child, merely human). and throughout all of this, I forgot the big picture (which may in fact, make me a child).
everyday the lives of six billion people play out. dreams are crushed, love is found, new beginnings start, beautiful things die, but hope survives. I forgot that what happened this week in my small life means more than just ‘I hate this situation and I hate how I handled it’.
but the moon, my dad, and the girls from the ludo reminded me. there is a lot more going on than my stupid exams. so what if I have to take them in septemeber, I’ll do fine. in fact, it will most likely be a blessing in disguise (as most things are, or end up being). we all learn way more outside of the classroom anyway, but in that respect, I can’t help but feeling like I failed my ‘life final’ to this experience.
it’s not easy for me to admit that I was scared by this ‘sickness’. the idea that one small little particle can end a life just made me feel tragically fragile. all I really wanted was to go home, but not because home is safe. home may not be a perfect place, there may be a pandemic there too, or civil unrest or death or uncertainty, but it is home. and it is where my small life, in that small acre on Glenallen Avenue, feels safe.
and so, I apologize for my behavior. but know I never meant to cause you trouble or do you harm. I just forgot that the moon shines and that bad things are going to happen, and how we deal with those things are what defines who we are.
2.7.09
mate and gripe
It's officially finals season! I'm up at ungodly hours of the night, thinking deep thoughts instead of reading the GIANT MOUNTAIN of paper that I need to conquer in the next week... And along with these deep thoughts, I have my MATE! ahaha, you pronounce it ma tay, not mate. So it's a delicious argentine custom in which you take dry herb and poor it into a special mug that has a straw with a filter at the bottom. Then, you poor in warm water and drink through the straw! To me it tastes a lot like green tea, but much more fun. "Taking mate" is quite a process and there are a lot of rules... Normally you drink it with a group of people and lets just say, it would literally take a lifetime to get every little thing perfect. But, I've become quite the expert, so when i get home (two weeks!) just say the word and I will personally teach you about the rewarding mystical beauty of mate! In other news, "LA GRIPE" aka swine flu has become quite the issue here in BsAs. The city has declared a state of health emergency and everyone is laying low at the moment. To me, people seem to be making a bigger deal out of it than it needs to be (but it might be that I'm in 'that' stage of my life). Just eat your fruits and veggies, take your vitamins and don't take mate after others or greet people with kisses (interesting to look at the cultural variables that play into pandemics)...
It's officially finals season! I'm up at ungodly hours of the night, thinking deep thoughts instead of reading the GIANT MOUNTAIN of paper that I need to conquer in the next week... And along with these deep thoughts, I have my MATE! ahaha, you pronounce it ma tay, not mate. So it's a delicious argentine custom in which you take dry herb and poor it into a special mug that has a straw with a filter at the bottom. Then, you poor in warm water and drink through the straw! To me it tastes a lot like green tea, but much more fun. "Taking mate" is quite a process and there are a lot of rules... Normally you drink it with a group of people and lets just say, it would literally take a lifetime to get every little thing perfect. But, I've become quite the expert, so when i get home (two weeks!) just say the word and I will personally teach you about the rewarding mystical beauty of mate! In other news, "LA GRIPE" aka swine flu has become quite the issue here in BsAs. The city has declared a state of health emergency and everyone is laying low at the moment. To me, people seem to be making a bigger deal out of it than it needs to be (but it might be that I'm in 'that' stage of my life). Just eat your fruits and veggies, take your vitamins and don't take mate after others or greet people with kisses (interesting to look at the cultural variables that play into pandemics)...
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